Friday, January 15, 2010

Cheater Incident Report

CASE: 004

CLIENT: Maggie Halfast

SUBJECT: Aaron Bolster

FINDINGS: At approximately 7 p.m. on January 12th, Mr. Bolster was seen arriving at the Regal Cinemas with an unknown accomplice. The girl was quickly identified as Amber Browerstine--his chem partner. Despite the clicheness of it, their relationship seemed obvious when Mr. Bolster held the door and then purchased her Twizzlers at the concession stand.

Enclosed are the photos documenting their time together. You'll notice in frame 62 that Mr. Bolster and Ms. Browerstine sat in the back row of a horror film. And in photo 64 you'll notice that they were not watching it.

The couple was then seen outside Taco Bell sharing nachos. Included is an audio recording in which Mr. Bolster swears that he is single. He also swears that "tonight will be amazing." You'll observe from photos 68-75 that it was not.

We trust that this report will remain confidential as some of the information contained within could compromise our top-secret status.

SOS is sorry for your loss, and we offer our deepest sympathies. We hope that we will not have to assist you again in the future, but please keep us in mind for referrals.

Keep smiling,